Large vocabulary aside, I was watching a horribly depressing film starring Billy Bob Thornton on STARZ this afternoon when I got home from school and was struck by the simple fact that I had no idea why the movie was called "Sling Blade." Until later in the movie that is. And then my topic (like the sling blade to Billy's mama in the movie) hit me like a ton of bricks.
Which brings me to our topic today:
Ladies and Gentlemen:
The Sling Blade
AKA: Brush Hook, Kaiser Blade, Bush Hook or Ditch Bank Blade
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| Ditch Bank Blade |
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| Sling Blade |
The tool is meant to be used by a standing individual in order to clear brush or grass low to the ground in an area like a ditch or rocky outcropping where a mower would be unpractical. My dad always used ours (oh. apparently we have one. don't mess with me) to trim crab grass in our front yard. That of course was before age 50 set in and the present tradition of using an electric hedger came into vogue (along with the lazy). As you've noticed I have listed additional names for this tool/weapon I did this because this tool comes in a plethora of different styles. I picked the one that l liked best (and the one I'd seen before in our garage, quietly rusting). Try googling any of the other names listed and see what pops up if you are so inclined. Anywho.
As you can see by the design of the tool, it is very similar in design to an ax--in fact the handle is an ax handle. The blade itself is sharp on the outside and inside of the curve. The point is not meant for stabbing but instead better facilitates the slicing motion used to slice at scrub brush. OR ZOMBIE FLESH! The blade is made of steel coated in some poly-plastic covering to help prevent rust and chips.
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| Scimitar: Big Fat Curve |
The reason I like this tool as a zombie weapon is because of that curve. Stabbing weapons don't have curves like the Roman Gladius or the French Rapier. Even the Scottish Claymore or English Hand and a Half sword are more meant for hacking/chopping. Curved weapons are meant to slice. I like slicing because if the blade is sharp enough, it requires the least amount of work. It's why Katanas and Scimitars are curved: their intent is to slice through whatever they hit.
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| Gladius: no curve |
That curve makes the metal of the tool move fast in whatever direction the blade is moving. It also helps cut through the substance its going through so that when the rest of the blade comes through there is less resistance. It makes the motion of slicing more natural and easy on the slicer.
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| Hand and Half Sword: No Curve |
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Katana: Slight Curve |
Also, since the tool is meant to be used by a person standing up the handle is long enough to be used in a slicing motion to a ghoul a few steps away---but can be short hefted to slash at a zombie close up.
BWAHAHA.
I also really like how easily obtainable and cheap this tool is. I found one in walmart for like 50 bucks. Certainly can't buy a hardy sword for that cheap.
I really like weapons that double as tools because it just means one less thing my lazy butt has to carry. Weapons that don't require a ton of maintenance and training to use are also a plus. I don't really need a ton of aim to slice the top of a zombie's head off with a sling blade. In theory.
Tee hee.
Anyway. Raid walmart. Do it.
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| Practical--er use |
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| Practical Use |
As a side note, good people. Could I have some suggestions? Send me Gun and melee weapon suggestions!! OR questions about first aide. Or something! I need research topics!!!
I heart you, you zombie fanatics you.
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